


Frame of Reference

by chargetransfer



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gen, batcave physics, quantum angels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-11
Updated: 2014-09-11
Packaged: 2018-02-17 01:22:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 309
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2291741
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chargetransfer/pseuds/chargetransfer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Cas ficlet, set after 9.09. Based on my vague headcanons around grace and the nature of angels</p>
            </blockquote>





	Frame of Reference

Castiel feels the foreign grace trapped within him, unsynchronized, imperfectly matched functions creating beasts and destructive interference, unstable orbits and energy levels that cannot come (ache to come) to ground state.

He is trapped within this body, unable to expand to all the probabilities that he should encompass as a wavelength of celestial intent.  He has collapsed into this form and the observer will not look away.  He is not sure if it is his soul – if it is even a soul that formed in the vacuum of the grace torn from his psyche during his forced transformation to humanity – that causes the coalescence of celestial functions into a single harmonic.  He suspects it is more the severing of the tie to heaven, the loss of entanglement, since his brothers are filled with their own grace, yet unable to expand to all their infinite possibilities.

He cannot tell.  The stolen grace rests uneasily against his perhaps-human soul.  He finds humanity so…Newtonian.  He hadn’t felt it so keenly with the here-now-once senses of his human self as his only means of observations.  But now, with the wider angelic sense returned, the painful reality is obvious.

It is also painfully ironic to recall his absolute conviction, despite his quantum selfhood as an angel and compare it to his human, Newtonian body with all his attendant uncertainties.

The memory of human immediacy is sharp and strong, and despite the limitations of human thought and form, he finds regret in its loss and longs for its return.  He is needed by his friend, though, with grace (foreign as it was) intact.  Though suppressing such feelings is more difficult than before his descent into humanity, he locks them down as best he can and turns his face towards the place humanity called Kansas.

\--

Originally posted [here](http://daugerresearch.com/orbitals/index.shtml).

Screencap from [here](http://www.homeofthenutty.com/supernatural/screencaps/thumbnails.php?album=190).

Orbital visualization from [here](http://chargetransfer.tumblr.com/post/73010605654/frame-of-reference-spn-ficlet).


End file.
